Thursday, May 23, 2013

You Talkin' To Me?

NSVs Linkup with Lex and KTJ

In all honesty, I think the only reason why I've experienced the success I have on this fitness journey thus far (which is the last in a long line of many half-assed attempts), is because I'm doing it for me. 

When I've tried to change my lifestyle in the past, it's been for superficial short-lived reasons: because I wanted to not be embarrassed at my yearly checkup at the doctor's office. Because I wanted to look good in my swimsuit during gym class (sidebar: whoever thought a swim unit was a good idea for 5th and 6th graders is seriously disturbed). Because I wanted some guy to like me. Because my friends were skinner than me. Because I wanted to wear a certain size.

Now, I'm doing it for me. Because I want to my outside to match my inside. Because I want to be comfortable. Because I want to be healthy. Because I want to feel confident about my appearance. Because I don't want to look back on my 20's with regret about what I did or didn't do. Because I don't want my size to hold me back from anything.

That's what inspires me to stay on the bandwagon (99.9% of the time). And, at least thus far, it's worked.

And while I've received some great compliments from family and friends since beginning this journey, one stands out. The other day, a coworker told me that seeing my Map My Runs on Facebook in the morning is inspirational to her. 

Me? Moi?

Does she know that I usually spend the first half of my runs wondering how much longer until I get to turn around? That I have to talk myself out of stopping to walk at least a few times on every single run? That sometimes I do stop to walk, and then beat myself up about it? That I get frustrated and mad and sometimes just want to quit and go home and lay on the couch and eat Fritos?

Nope. Because she sees what I sometimes have a hard time seeing: that I did it. Period. 

I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy the compliments I've gotten about my weight loss, but this one is definitely a non-scale victory, and one I plan to hold on to. I've never been called inspirational before, but to be called inspirational for my new running habit is crazy to me. And it's gonna keep me going.

I've come pretty far, but I've still got a long ways to go. 

What were your NSVs this week?

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Boom Goes the Dynamite

Weigh-in Wednesday time!


I hit 188 last Thursday (marking the 40lbs lost threshold, which meant I treated myself to a mani last weekend). But after overindulging a bit all weekend for my birthday, I was pretty convinced there was no freakin' way I'd hit my Dietbet goal of 188.5. In fact, I weighed in the last two two days at 190-191ish. Woke up this morning and weighed in pre-run at 190.6. Basically, I needed a miracle and to cash in on some karma points.

So let's talk about my run. It was a 50% chance of raining all morning, but I thought God smiled upon me and put the rain on pause so I could get my booty outta bed at 5:45am (earlier than usual, because I had a conference this morning). HOW WRONG I WAS. I'm just under halfway done with my 3 miles and boom, it's suddenly down-pouring. We're talking big fat elephant tear raindrops. 

Welp. I was already out and close enough to my half-way point that I decided I might as well keep going. So I took a minute to stuff my arm band and iPhone into my waistband, tied the drawstring tight, and kept moving. It was a little awkward, my face felt like it was melting, and my shoes were squishing every step. But I did the damn thing.

Wouldn't you know that I came home, hopped on the scale, and weighed in:

Previous Weight: 189.6
Current Weight: 187.8
Change: -1.8

Boom goes the dynamite. 

Weigh-in success and sweet sweet Dietbet victory is mine. And, with less than 10lbs to go, my 10-Week Challenge Goal (179) is in my crosshairs. 

Now crossing my fingers for a good Dietbet payday! The mall is calling my name...

Monday, May 20, 2013

Back at it.

I'm baaaaaaack!

You may have noticed I took a little hiatus last week, for reasons I'd rather not talk about just yet. But apart from that, I had a fabulous 24th birthday last Friday (5/17). As I said on Facebook, I'm the luckiest girl to have absolutely amazing friends and family in my life. To those of you, near and far, who made me feel so loved and celebrated, I am truly grateful.

PS - I'm on Instagram here!
And, my big news on the weight front, is that as of 5/16, I weighed in at exactly 188 on the nose-- a 40 lb loss, and a major milestone I was hoping to hit before my birthday! 

It was not my goal, however, to try to eat and drink those el bees back throughout the weekend... but, sometimes you've gotta break the rules. I tracked everything and only tapped 3 points into my APs (the weeklies were exhausted), but have a feeling I may not be hitting my Dietbet goal weight (188.5) this Wednesday. Blehhhh. If I fail, it was still worth it.

My weekend: mani (reward for the 40 lb mark), sunshine, a new book,
and desperate [unsuccessful] attempts to tan my legs.
In the meantime, you can find trying to sweat my face off until Wednesday.

Operation Skinny Jeans

Now that I'm back to the grind, it's time to get back to goal-setting with Jess' weekly goals linkup. I actually did hit my goal of exercising 5 days last week. As I've said before, I'm trying to work on consistent mileage in my running, in hopes of (maybe? possibly? ayiii?) signing up for a half marathon this fall. 

While I didn't get in a long run (5+ miles, for me), I did manage 4 days of running for a total of 13.1 miles run. On my non-running day (Saturday), I did this arm workout again. I had the crazy revelation that I used to have FIVE 8-lb dumbbells of extra weight on me at the beginning of this journey. 

Oh, and because everyone's always talking about squats, I threw in 100 squats (34 regular, 33 toes in, 33 plie), because 100 seemed like a nice, round number. HOLY COW. My legs were fine yesterday, but I am in pain today. But good pain. Like, I did my legs good, kinda pain.

And now, for this week:

1) Do not eat more than the activity points I earn.

I typically allow myself to eat (... or drink) all of my extra weekly points, and leave my activity points untouched. When I go over my daily points (31PP), It deducts from my weeklies. In an effort to not overdo it, I'm only allowing myself to eat back as many APs as I gain, even though it'll still pull from my weeklies first. This way, I'm forced to be accountable over Memorial Day. Even though I'll be at my roommate's lake house. And probably eating (... or drinking) a lot.

Hopefully this motivates me to a) work out, and b) still be reasonable in my eating.

2) Drink 128oz water daily. 

I've been killin' it on the water-drinking front, ever since I got this bad boy, my new $3 best friend:

Not mine, but close enough.

At 24oz., I'll need to drink 5 of these babies a day, plus whatever I drink at home before/after work. Totally doable. Very necessary (especially with the high temps in Chicago the past few days). This is the team goal for Jess' 10-week challenge group, so I have high hopes that I can nail it!

What are your goals for this week?

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Transformation Tuesday

I missed the buck on Monday's usual goal-setting because unfortunately I was stuck at work until 7pm. ALAS, even though I didn't get to do the link-up, I still want to be accountable for last week's goals:

1) Eat more salad.

And I did! I bought another big bag of lettuce and all the fixins' for some bigass salads. Because if I'm gonna eat a salad, it better at least be giant and substantial. Not only that, but I've really be making it a priority to eat fruits and veggies for snacks almost all of the time. I bought a TON of fruits and veggies the past two weeks, and have been eating almost exclusively fruits and veggies as my snacks. Pre-WW Carolyn never would've thought that a snack of—GASP—an apple could be satisfying, but post-WW Carolyn reports that, indeed, it can be. Granted, sometimes I would really rather have an entire freakin' bag of Fritos (seriously, I've been jonesin' for Fritos lately... get at me), but by having low (or no!) point snacks, I can reserve my daily allowance for larger meals, even though I'm eating just as often. Win!

2) Work out 4-5 times.

Guys. Every time I give myself a range of times I want to workout, it's because I'm convinced that I'll only hit the bottom part of that range. And every week I Jedi-mind trick myself into hitting the max workouts I wanted to hit. It's weird gypsy magic, but I'm sticking with it. Here was what I did last week:

MON - OFF (recovery from cinco de miler) + plank + pushups
TUE - 3 mile run + plank
WED - 4 mile run + pushups + plank
THUR - OFF + plank
FRI - 3 mile run + pushups + plank
SAT - 5 mile run + plank
SUN - 2 mile run + arm workout
TOTAL MILEAGE: 17 miles!

This is definitely the most mileage I've hit in a week... probably since I ran track my freshman year of high school. I'm hoping to keep up a solid base mileage in this range as I think about mayyyybe signing up for a half marathon this fall. EEK.

Also, it's Tuesday and my arms are STILL dying from Sunday's arm workout. I want to start toning my arms to avoid the dreaded underarm flab as I continue to lose weight. This workout, using my roommate's 8lb weights was definitely more of a challenge than I anticipated. I did the whole workout, except the wrist/forearm exercises, because I've broken and/or had surgery on both wrists, so sometimes these types of things put strain on my past injuries. Plus, I'm more concerned about biceps and triceps than forearms anyway.

Lastly, it's Transformation Tuesday.

L: 228 lbs (Oct 2012), R: 191 lbs (May 2013)

Lately, I've been drawing more and more confidence and inspiration from my own journey up until this point, as well as from the lovely ladies in Jess' 10 Week Challenge group. The other people in this group truly run the gambit in terms of where they are in their journeys, but every single day I enjoy celebrating (and am motivated by) their successes. It's such a supportive environment, and I think it's helping me really kick my booty in gear these past few weeks.

On the phone the other day, my mom asked me if I ever thought I'd lose this much weight, and truly the answer is no. In my mind, I had "tried" dieting before, to no avail beyond a short-lived 10-15 lb loss. It's not that I imagined I'd be at my highest weight forever, it's that I never allowed myself to truly think that it was possible that I would hit numbers I haven't seen on the scale in years.

Today marks my 6-month anniversary of WW, and, coincidentally, I hit my half-way mark in terms of overall pounds lost just this morning (39 of 78 lbs). While my official weigh-in isn't until tomorrow, I hit 189 lbs this morning, my lowest weight in about four years, and a huge victory as I close in on the 40lbs lost mark. I've been getting great feedback from family and friends, but the biggest milestone for me right now is knowing that I did this. It's certainly still a work in progress, but I'm a helluva lot closer than I was 6 months ago.

Sunday, May 12, 2013

A to Z, Me

I'm a terrible blogger because I can't recall where I first saw this post, but I thought it'd be fun post. Enjoy, and feel free to answer the questions yourself!

age: 23 (for only 4 more days, eek!)

bed size: Double

chore you hate: Putting away laundry.

dogs: none. But one day I'm going to get an english bulldog and name him Archibald. 

essential start to your day: Mascara. My eyelashes are too blonde to be left nekkid.

favorite color: GREEN

guilty pleasures: Oh just every reality TV show ever created. Except "Jersey Shore." Even I have standards.

height: 5'5.5"

instrument you play: I played the piano for 12 years when I was younger.

job title: I'm an Account Coordinator. 

kids: Yikes.

live: Grew up in small-town Chesterland, OH. Went to college in NC and my parents live there now. Currently living in Chicago and have been for almost two years!

married:  To my job.

nicknames: How much time ya got? Quick story: During college I studied abroad in Ireland. My family came to visit me. They didn't have an irish phone, so we had to rely on a meetup time at Trinity College. My mom found me by yelling (in Ireland... in a large crowd of strangers) "SNIIIIIIIIIIRTY! SNIIIIIIRT!" Yeah, that happened. 

My family calls me: Pooh, Pooh Magoo, Queen Pooh, Snirt, Snirtlyn T, Snirty, Care, Carebear. My friends call me: Caro, Carol, CB, CarBaum, and Jugs. 

obsessions: Lockup Raw on MSNBC, the legal system, Honey Boo Boo, some e-cards.

pet peeve: Lateness. 


religion: I was born and raised Catholic, and went to Catholic schools from K-12.

siblings: Two younger brothers: N (age 21) and M (age 19).

time you wake up: Depends on if I have to run and/or shower, but sometime between 6:00-7:45am.

university attended: Elon University in Elon, NC.

vegetables you dislike: Celery. Which makes my love of egg and chicken salad really inconvenient. 

what makes you run late: The CTA. 

x-rays you've had: Teeth, wrist, ankle, wrist again.

yummy food: I could really for some mac & cheese right about now.

zoo animals: Penguins

Thursday, May 9, 2013

Finish the Sentence and NSVs

In addition to my NSVs (which are below), I'm linking with with Holly and Jake for this week's Finish the Sentence linkup...


Unlike my siblings (that I love very much)... I remembered that Sunday is Mother's Day. Thank God my mom had one daughter.

My best friend says... that I am 100% predictable. Valid.

People call me... Pooh, Queen Pooh, Pooh Magoo, Snirt, Snirtlyn T, Snirtlyn Therese, Jugs, Carol, Care, Carebear, CB. Would you like me to continue?

I most often dream... that I'm in a really messed up situation and running/hiding for my life. Freud would have a field day with that ish.

The best part of my day... is usually dinner and veg-out time after work. 

I really don't understand... why I am physically incapable of making it through an entire tube of chapstick without losing it and/or accidentally putting it through the wash.

I get really annoyed... when people on the train sit in the aisle seat and leave the window seat open, and then give me the stinkeye when I ask them if I can please sit there.

There's nothing like a... city beer garden on a summer night.

Lately, I can't get enough... string cheese. If eating string cheese multiple times a day is wrong, I don't wanna be right.

One thing I am NOT is... poker-faced. My face always gives away how I really feel. I may or may not have been called out for this in a meeting at work today. 
"I'm not making a face. I swear."
I spent too much money on... clothes and shoes last month. And the month before. And probably the month before that, too.

I want to learn.... Spanish fluently. I've taken many years of lessons, but not consistently enough to be fluent.

If I ever met Jake in real life , I would... high five him for his appreciation for good grammar.

I can't stop... watching Lockup: Raw on Saturday nights. I think I was destined to be a criminal psychologist in another life. 

Never have I ever... seen a James Bond movie. Nope, not even one.

Reese Witherspoon... is just BEYOND.



I'm excited to be linking up with Lex and KTJ for this week's NSV linkup! I've been sitting on these bad boy NSVs since last weekend.

  1. I tried on a dress I've been lusting after at LOFT and the 14 was too big. I generally wear one dress size larger than my pants size to accommodate the girls, so that fact that I needed a 12 was so exciting! ... except that they didn't have a 12 in the store. Or in the other LOFT near my apartment. So I will never know if that dress actually fits. CAN'T WIN 'EM ALL.
    Trying to hold the extra fabric on the side to see
    what it'd look like in a smaller size. No dice.
  2. I have had an issue in the past with Forever 21, because there's a pretty big discrepancy between their plus sizing and their regular sizing (please tell me I'm not the only one who thinks this!). I would be swimming in their smallest plus size top (this from a girl with a pretty large chest), but not even close to fitting into a regular large. Anyway, I went to a Forever 21 that didn't have a plus size section with my roommate last weekend, and I grabbed a bunch of clothes to try on, knowing I'd either walk out of the fitting room really excited, or really frustrated. To my surprise, every single thing in a large (with the exception of one teeny tiny miniskirt) fit me perfectly! I haven't bought a regular large from Forever 21 in probably at least 3-4 years. It was awesome. 
  3. I've gotten so much better at drinking water lately! I got this handy little tumbler with a lid and straw (Walmart for $3 holla), and it holds 24oz, so I just know that each day I need to fill it up 4 times, and anything else I drink at home before/after work is extra. BOOM.
  4. Completely unrelated to anything fitness or healthiness, a really cute stranger held his umbrella for me when I exited the train and was walking toward the covered platform. D'awww. Cute stranger, you made my day.

What were your NSVs this week?

PS- That teaser last week about doing something I had never done before in my adult life? Yeah, I was really excited to join this spankin' new (really cheap!) gym near my apartment. Too bad I went to take the tour, only to learn that the gym wasn't opening for at least 90 more days. Needless to say, I'm still gym-less. Boo.

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Hump Day Happiness


It's Weigh-In Wednesday with Erin and Alex's Weigh-In Wednesday linkup! Here's the deets:

Previous Weight: 194.4
Current Weight: 191.8
Change: -2.6

Yeehaw-- I'm really excited about this loss! I've had weeks where I felt really on-track, and didn't see the payoff, so it's always nice to have validation on the scale. Especially after last night's angst and a rough run again this morning (I think I'm still recovering from Sunday).

I was hoping to hit 189 for my birthday, which is next Friday. I'm not giving up hope yet, but it may be a stretch. Either way, I'm a solid 15 lbs lighter than I was on my last birthday, which is still something to celebrate.

For validation OFF the scale, I've been saving up a few really satisfying NSVs for tomorrow's linkup :)

How'd your weigh-in go this week?

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Transformation Tuesday

I had a rough run this morning.

It's only Tuesday and I'm ready for this week to be over.

I'm worried about my Dietbet because the final weigh-in is just a few days after my birthday weekend.

Work. Grr. Work.

Plank month is getting hard, y'all.

Sometimes I just want a freakin' cheeseburger.

And fries.

And pizza.

But then I remember where I'm coming from and where I'm headed. 

L: Oct '12 (228 lbs). R: April '13 (195 lbs).

And so I keep going.

Monday, May 6, 2013

Gettin' It: Goals

Operation Skinny Jeans

Linking up with Jess from Operation Skinny Jeans to check out how I did on last week's goals, and to gear up for this week. First, last week:

1) Do some dang pushups.

And I did! I'm a super cheapskate when it comes to downloading apps on my phone, so when I downloaded this app for $1.99, I was committed to the cause. I will say the this app advocates doing full-body pushups (as opposed to knee or "girly" pushups). I was struggling to do the full-body ones, so I'm going to stick with the knee pushups, at least for this first go-around.

Also, I'm doing this plank challenge. Which makes me cry on a daily basis. It's normal for your abs to want to weep after doing pushups and planks, right? Bueller?

Note: dates do not match days of the week. I didn't make this.

2) Get more sleep.

Not too shabby! I think I got 7+ hours of sleep 5 days of the week, which is pretty phenomenal for me.

3) Run a sub 55-minute 5-miler.

Well, I knew this goal might be a little bold, but I'm pretty pumped about how close I came to actually achieving it! I finished in 57:22 baby, with room for improvement next time!

Onto this week's goals:

1) Eat more salad.

I've seen advice from countless bloggers who are further along in their fitness journeys than I, and they all say to step away from the Smart Ones and eat some salad. Admittedly, I often turn to Smart Ones because they're pretty fool-proof. This week, I'm going to start [slowly] replacing frozen meals with more fresh veggies.

BOOM: Proof.
This baby might look deceptively small
because of my thumb but it's a massive 12PP
salad with avocado, turkey, carrots, black beans
and lite honey mustard dressing.

2) Work out 4-5 times.

And no, doing 35 seconds of planking doesn't count as a workout. If I'm actually going to sign up for a half marathon this fall (a thought that terrifies me, just typing it), I need to get used to running more than 3 days/week for training purposes. Also, if I want to accomplish my 10-week challenge goal (fit in a size 10 in 10 weeks)... I need to up my regimen.

What are your goals for the week?

Sunday, May 5, 2013

Cinco De Miler

Happy Cinco de Mayo! This morning I had Chicago's Cinco de Miler, aka my first ever 5-mile race (and Chicago's only 5-mile race, or so they say). My roommate and I woke up at 7am to head over to Montrose Harbor for the race-day festivities. To be honest, I was a little nervous, for a few reasons:
  1. It was my first 5-mile race
  2. I actually trained for this race, unlike previous 5K's (3.1 miles) where I've pretty much gone in with a "hope I can do this" mentality
OH, and did I mention that my kickball team's first game was basically immediately after the race? And that it's a singles' league so I wanted to at least look like I wasn't on the brink of death when I showed up? Yeahhhh.

So, I had two goals for the race, with one being semi-lofty and the other being reasonable. My lofty goal was to finish in <55 minutes (<11 minute miles), and my realistic goal was to finish in <60 minutes (12 minute miles). According to Map My Run, my longest ever run was last weekend when I did 6 miles at an 11:18 pace, so I figured, realistically, I'd finish somewhere between the two.  

Annnnnnnd, here's the official result:

I finished in 57:22, meaning that I averaged a hair under an 11:30 min/mile pace. AND, I didn't even walk once (which was a major mental goal for me)! 

A few thoughts about the race:
  • Our corrals were paced about 3 minutes apart. Meaning, at corral H, I had to wait over 20 minutes from the race start until my actual start time. This meant I wasn't as loose, because I stretched before I entered my corral around 9:05am. Next time I'll wait to stretch until entering my corral.
  • Because the corrals were so spaced out that there wasn't much congestion, even on narrow paths, which was really nice!
  • I spent the entire first mile convincing myself that there was NO way I'd be able to run the whole race. Our first mile was basically though a parking lot, so it was a strange place to start. That, combined with some initial tightness, threw me off.
  • Map My Run appears to be off by about .1 mile per mile of running, so it was off by an entire half mile by the end of the race. That was disconcerting because MMR was telling me that I was at 5 miles, and I couldn't even see the finish chute yet.
  • The route was beautiful! We went through the park that surrounds Montrose Harbor, as well as right along the lakeshore, which gave us some great views! It was definitely pretty sunny at points though, which I could feel draining me.
  • The route wasn't HILLY, but there were some inclines. I'm a wimp when it comes to any elevation changes because I have the luxury of running on a completely (100%) flat route near my apartment... perks of living in a really flat city. There were also some points where we ran on sand paths, which I wasn't expecting. 
All in all, I'm so glad I did this race. Even for all the points where it was hard, and where I thought I wouldn't be able to run the entire course, it was worth it in the end. I finished within my realistic goal, and my friends finished within their goals too!

Bonus: look at this comparison from my first 5K (The Color Run in October 2012), my second 5K (Santa Hustle in December 2012) and now (May 2013). There's a 35lb different between these first and last photos: 

If that's not motivation to keep running, I don't know what is.

PS- We won our kickball game 12-0

PPS - I'm extremely sunburned. WHOOPS.

Did you accomplish any goals this weekend? 

Thursday, May 2, 2013

Little Victories


Celebrating the [ALMOST] end of the week by joining Lex and KTJ's NSV Linkup!

Hmm, it's been a weird week, so I didn't think as much about NSVs as I usually do. So, this will be a bulleted stream of consciousness:
  • If I pose in the mirror like the incredible hulk, I can start to see inklings of my collar bones. Who knew those bad boys even existed? I didn't realize they weren't there until suddenly they kindof were. I'll spare ya a photo until they're actually visible.
  • Uh, I ran six freaking miles on Sunday. Done and done.
  • I actually started doing a push-up and plank regimen this week. I've been meaning to add more strength training to my schedule, because I know cardio won't get me to the finish line on its own. So, I'm using THIS pushups app and doing this plank workout to start to start toning:
Let me know if you're going to join me! Also, I just noticed the days aren't
correctly matched with the number dates, but just go by the numbers!
  • I won a copy of "The Handmaid's Tale" from the lovely Kate at The Widgeon Nest! I'd been meaning to read the book for awhile since having heard Caitlyn (Healthy Tipping Point) talk about it, and now I finally will!
  • A Story: I went for a run last week and planned to end right by my grocery store to kill two birds with one stone. I hit the 3 mile mark and stopped just as a man (probably a little younger than my dad's age) entered the parking lot on his bike and stopped to lock it up on a fence right next to me. I'm huffing and puffing and sweating and tomato-faced (per usual), and he says hi. I say "hi, how are you?" to which he replied, "Better, now that I saw you." Soooo, maybe it was a tiny bit creepy, but it just made me smile because I felt about peak post-workout grossness at that very moment. 

And tonight after work I'm doing something I've never ever done in my adult life before... which will definitely be an NSV next week. Yes, I'm leaving you in suspense, and no, it's not as scandalous as it sounds. ;)

What were your NSVs this week?

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Dietbet D-Day


I'm joining in Erin and Alex's Weigh-In Wednesday linkup once more. PLUS, this day was also important as it was the end of my first official Dietbet, so I needed to make it count... especially after last week's slight gain.

Previous Weight: 195.4
Current Weight: 194.4
Change: -1.0

So the weigh-in was a success, but I was worried about my Dietbet because it technically ended this afternoon, but I was doubtful that I'd be able to have a successful weigh-in this evening a) because I was at a conference all day, which meant eating less carefully than usual, b) because I didn't run this morning, and c) because I'm about to start my period tomorrow.

Long story short, I had a few (3) drinks this evening between the post-conference party and my kickball team's first meeting. I didn't eat dinner because I splurged on Chik-fil-a at lunch. So, I figured I'd chug water tonight, run tomorrow morning, and then weigh-in successfully. YES I REALIZE THIS IS NOT THE RIGHT THING TO DO. However, I've consistently weighed in at or below my Dietbet goal weight in the past week, so I didn't want my period to blow me off-track, as I usually gain 2-3 lbs in the first few days. 

Out of curiosity, I weighed in this evening as soon as I got home from kickball, and was very pleased to see that I was exactly .1 below my Dietbet goal. I feverishly snapped my pictures and sent 'em in. Seconds later, weigh-in verified! Great success!

Now, momma needs to eat some dinner.